Femininity and Christianity 

I hear so many people talk negatively about using the new year as a fresh start. They often criticize new year resolutions, or phrases like, “new year, new me.” But the fact of the matter is that every day, every hour, and every minute is a new opportunity. A chance to try a new hobby, or work on your procrastination, or in my case, develop a deeper relationship with God. There is no room for pessimistic energy in this feminine space. Isaiah 43:18-19 says, Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?.

As a young girl, I spent every weekend at my grandmother’s house. My grandmother had an almost-perfect relationship with God ( I say almost perfect because no one is perfect, but honestly speaking, I feel like it was more than perfect.) She woke up every morning at 5am to pray and spend time with God. She then read her daily devotional at breakfast time, she mainly listened to gospel/christian music, she read her evening devotional at dinner, and ended the day with prayer and more worship. I watched her very closely and observed her relationship with God.

In her relationship with God, she operated purely in her feminine energy. Of course as a child I didn’t understand that, but now as an adult, I really examined how she was with God. She was always open to receiving and she listened to God closely. She didn’t just spend her private time with God praying, but she would often say that she uses that time to also hear from God. She would sit with him for a while, not asking or praying, but receiving and listening to what God was telling her. She was also very emotional with God. She never shied away from praising God, and letting him know how much she loved him. 

The most important one for me—she surrendered to God. To paint the picture: My grandmother was far from wealthy. I think she would’ve been considered working class. But she never worried about anything. Now I don’t mean that in the literal sense. (I’m sure she worried about plenty of things), but she never let it consume her. Any time I describe the life she lived to people, I say “she was so content”. She truly gave all her finances, worries, doubt, fears, everything to God, and truly believed and knew that he would work everything out. 

Now I am in no way saying that that relationship is easy to build, but for me personally, it’s something I strive for. It was because of the relationship my grandmother had with God that I was able to see what a truly healthy relationship looked like. Because she casted all cares on God, she was able to nurture me, teach me how to be vulnerable and express my emotions, and was honestly my only source of feminine energy throughout my entire childhood.

Losing her was one of the hardest things I ever had to go through in life, but I know I serve a God who never does anything without a lesson. I believe that not only was it her time to go home, but God later revealed to me that my relationship with him wouldn’t have started developing if she was still here. Honestly, I used to say things like, “my grandmother and God are so tight, and I know that she is always praying for me so I am good.” But now, I have to learn about God for myself, pray for myself, and learn how to operate in my feminine energy with him. 

I don’t want to dive too deep into the bible because I am no expert, but if you really think about it, God dislikes hypermasculinity. There are more than several instances in the bible where God really focuses on feminine energy. There are so many but one that stands out is the story of Job. To sum it up, Job maintained faith in God even when facing immense suffering and hardship. After losing everything, he tore his robe, shaved his head, and said, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised.” (Job 1:21)

Now I say again, this is in no way shape or form easy for a woman like me, who watched her mother “chase the bag”, make all the decisions for the household, and constantly worry about money. My grandmother, who worked minimum wage jobs her whole life, never stressed about bills, money, food, or anything. She always had everything she needed. Her ability to have everything fall apart around her, and still put all her trust in God looked like such a peaceful way of life. 

I aspire to live a free and humble life. I came across this reel the other day that started with, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”, and it listed a bunch of occupations and characteristics that are deeply rooted in masculine energy (doctor, lawyer, CEO, successful). But the creator ended with characteristics deeply rooted in feminine energy: kind, warm, happy, mindful, and ironic enough, the last word on the reel was content. I am not one to believe in coincidence, and I know God wanted me to come across that video because that is the life I am meant to live. I was telling my therapist a couple of days ago that I no longer have the desire to climb the corporate ladder, or be the most successful person in the room. I desire a life free of expectations when it comes to my financial status.

 To all my Christian girlys out there, you don’t have to completely abandon the desire to climb the corporate ladder like me, but I definitely challenge you to start working towards giving some of your stressors to God. We were not created to handle all of our own problems and suffering, that’s why we need God, and need to start allowing him to be God. 

Colossians 1:17-18 —17 He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. 18 And he is the head of the body, the church; he is the beginning and the firstborn from among the dead, so that in everything he might have the supremacy. 

How do you see femininity reflected in your spiritual journey or relationship with God? Do you feel your faith has shaped your understanding of what it means to be feminine?